This is the first in a series of books about my travels around the world, starting from the very beginning. Well, maybe not the very beginning. I skipped the bit where I come out of my mothers bum. I mean nobody wants to read about that, right? Me just sliding out of there, covered in all that icky omelette stuff. Thatd be gross. I also didn’t include the pain I endured as my wisdom teeth came through. Took like six weeks and it hurt like a punch in the balls. So anyway, back in 2009 I decided I was going to take a leaf out of Jade Goodys book; I shaved my head and did the off, never to return again. So join me as I accidentally circumnavigate the globe a few times for want of a map or itinerary, hoping that one day the next leap will be the leap home. Wait. That’s a TV show, I don’t want to go home. But I would like a hologram for a friend.