Rough sex is not vanilla. It’s about becoming mutually aroused by discomfort and integrating hair pulling, pushing around, manhandling and even spanking with sex. Gone are the tender caresses, and in their place are commands. The tone of rough sex is different than the sweet, sultry allure of a typical night. Rough sex gets physical and it can get vigorous. It can be intense because the line is there to be crossed. There’s an element of role-playing, but a good actor gives of himself so it’s not all about the role — it’s also about what you bring to it.