A huge collection of the world's best jokes that take a minute each to tell. Be instantly popular by using these jokes on colleagues and friends, just choose wise jokes that don't offend of course! Here are a few jokes, out of hundreds jam-packed in this book. A farmer named Muldoon lived alone in the countryside with his pet dog that he loved and smothered love on. After many long years of companionship, the dog eventually died so Muldoon went to his parish priest: "Father, my lovely old dog is dead. Could you say a mass for the creature?" Father Patrick replied, "I am so sorry to hear about your dog's death. But, unfortunately we cannot have services for an animal in church. However, there's a new denomination down the road, no telling what they believe in, but maybe they'll do something for your doggy friend." Muldoon said, "I'll go right now. Do you think $500 is enough to donate to the service?" Father Patrick replied: "Why didn't you tell me the dog was Catholic?!" There are three flies in a jar, two females and one male. The first female fly goes to the male fly and says "how do I get out of this jar?" The male fly replies, "Give me a kiss and I will tell you how." so she does and he says, "go to the bottom of the jar and fly to the top as hard as you possibly can and the lid will just pop off!" She did, and splat she died . The other female fly not seeing what happened asked him "how do I get out of this jar?" The male fly said, "Give me a kiss and I will tell you." so she does and he says, "go to the bottom of the jar and fly up to the top as hard as you possibly can and the lid will pop off!" She did, and splat, she dies. Then the male fly flies out of the jar. How did he escape? Give me a kiss and I'll tell you... An old man was walking in the forest when he heard by his feet a weak voice. He bent down to look and saw the voice had come from a little frog: "I'm a beautiful, erotic and sensual princess, skilled in all the carnal pleasures of love. An evil queen, envious of my charms, turned me into a frog, but if you kiss me Sir, I will once again be a fair maiden, and I will provide you with all the joys and delights of my voluptuous temperament and my endless love and lust. The old man picked up the little frog and put her into his pocket. Bewildered, the frog looked out and asked: "Why? You're not going to kiss me?" "No," replied the old man. "At my age it's more fun to have a talking frog than a sex maniac." A blonde is speaking to her psychiatrist. Blonde, "I'm on the road a lot you see, and my clients are complaining about never being able to contact me." Psychiatrist, "Don't you have a cellphone?" Blonde, "The calls were costing too much after a while, so I did the next best thing and put a mailbox on my rear seat." Psychiatrist, "Oh, and how's that working out?" Blonde, "Actually, I haven't received any letters yet." Psychiatrist, "And, erm, why do you think that is?"