It's 1995, and Lourdes O'Malley has grown up in her pop's Miami tattoo parlor and is now an accomplished tattoo artist in her own right, famous throughout motorcycle-gang counterculture.
Biker gangs nationwide have loved and protected Lou all her life. Unfortunately, when Lou's dream man, Galen Randall, miraculously actually begins pursuing her, the bumbling bikers mistake him for Buddy the Blade, a Las Vegas hit man.
The last time Buddy the Blade was in Miami, he went to Lou for a fancy tattoo. He also committed a murder, and, even though she doesn't know about the killing, only Lou O'Malley can place him in the vicinity on the day of the crime.
Randall meets Lou on a flight from Miami to L.A., but he doesn't tell her his name. When Lou disembarks in Denver, Randall determines to return from L.A., find her, and woo her.
Lou has worshipped Galen Randall from afar, admiring his nature photography in magazines. But the reclusive Randall has never allowed himself to be photographed. Identifying Randall is complicated further when his loyal chauffeur is photographed attending an L.A. gala disguised as Randall, so that Randall could be off chasing his lady love.
Between Randall's reclusiveness, Buddy the Blade's desire to silence Lou, and the phony chauffeur "Randall" appearing in all the newspapers, the stage is set for multiple cases of mistaken identity.
That's how it happens that when Lou O'Malley travels to Utah for a three-day weekend, she has no idea that, in her wake, her dimwitted defenders are waging a wild and wacky war against the innocent, bemused, but dauntless, Randall.
Will Randall and the biker gangsters settle their issues before the real Buddy the Blade shows up to kill Lou?