If a mountain man felt compelled to dance, how would he do it? If koala bears could talk, what would they say? And what's the right pickup line, if you're a necrophiliac? In the throes of debates like these, we're lucky to have the learned people of McSweeney's Internet Tendency, their humor website, and their edifying work. From their best-looking writers comes this collection of over three hundred lists, including - 'Signs Your Unicorn Is Cheating on You'; 'Errors in Communication Between My Hairdresser and Me, in the Form of What I Said and What He Heard'; 'Things This City Was Built On, Besides Rock 'n' Roll'; 'Things This One Girl Sitting Near Me in a Movie Theater Said Out Loud When One of the Characters Was Shown Pulling Into a Gas Station'; and much more.